If it ain't broke, BREAK IT!

isn't it amazing how we look at things that are broken. we don't want to fix em, we just want to buy the newest "improved" model. our culture views things that aren't "perfect" as replacable. well, let me tell you! God has been doing some rearranging of all that in my life.....
He has been breaking me of so much in my life. It wasn't until tonight that I began to have real joy in this season in my life. yeah, i'm sitting in Panera fighting back the tears, wiping snot on my sleeve (come on! you do it too!) and i have been reading some good stuff. in a book by Lon Solomon titled Brokenness, he shares his own life break downs and how God used that time in his life to make him the man he is today.
As Watchman Nee said, "Anyone who serves God will discover sooner or later the greatest hindrance to his work is not others, but himself." WOW! Talk about hitting me like a ton of bricks!
God works so crazy in each one of our lives! Looking at some of the famous peeps in the bible and examining what God did. God will have us succeed, but first we must fail so that we come to the end of "ourselves."

Jacob- God had him go mono e mono with an angel because he was so stubborn. on the flip side God renamed him Israel!
Peter-The Lord hit his pride with a stinkin rooster! Then the eyes of his Savior hit him and he was done. God used him to become one of the leaders of the church!
Moses- He thought he was a great leader, then he fled after he killed a man. That's where God Almighty met him in the desert for quite a long time! Then God met Moses on the back side of a mountain and revealed Himself to Moses. The dude went on to take a stroll with his people through a wall of water!
(Put your name here......) What is God trying to break you of?

Remember..... God will do whatever it takes for us to realize that this is the most important equation of life

JESUS + nothing

What a time in my life. God has taken all the props that i have used in my life and have not "fully" relied on the One who blessed me with it all. If this is what it takes to get me to listen and for My God to prune me and use me to glorify Him more....... Bring it!

Thank you all who are walking this time in my life with me. God is using you to provide encouragement and love during this and I am eternally grateful for it! I pray that I can do the same for you some day when God decides to "DO BUSINESS" with you.

2 Corinthians 12:9 "But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in your weakness."

BAM!

The Comfort Zone

As most of you know... I've become accustomed to not being comfortable in any circumstance in my life the past few years. As I prepare this week to move next weekend it's encouraged me to think about being comfortable. While I'll admit soem times I am not so happy with the Lord regarding the things He's brought my way - I am thankful for always feeling like I'm out of my comfort zone. I don't know what that is exactly. The women in my bible study have named me the "female Job" - and it was great to hear that. it made me happy because I know the end of the story! I know that while the Lord took away so much from Job, He gave Job Himself. Job knew what it was like to truly communicate with God. He heard the voice of God. Job didn't leave the Lord when he thought that God had left him.
I know what its like to have things, dreams, people, and plans taken away from you. But praise God, I know what it means to know that He has not abandoned me. To know that God is here today just as much as He was with Job. He may communicate differently at times, but He has not left. What a struggle its been these past few months. The things that I put confidence in were taken away.... job, $, a place to live..... but I want to tell you that I am thankful for it. God has revealed what it means to rely on His provisions. Many of you who are reading this have been instrumental in that! Thank you mucho! Thank you for allowing Christ to use you in my life. I have been learning that it's ok to ask for help. My pride of being the one who sucks it up and does what I have to in order to make it has been taken. I have been broken. I like being broken. It's a good place to be. I am so much more sensitive and thankful for what I DO have. I have the Creator of the world on my side, preparing my future for me that I have no idea what it will be. It's an honor to serve a God of surprise! I love surprises (for the most part - other then the time that my dress completely ripped down the front while I was a brides maid in my friends wedding - that was NOT good. But, thank God for Duck Tape!) - I hope to learn more in the days and months to come about what it means to rely solely on Christ. To gain confidence in what He desires for my life and that my heart will desire what His plan is for my life this side of the presence of Him.

The ultimate goal is not just to know God, but God Himself.

peace out -
Jenn <><

So uuhh...

It's like 1:20 am and I'm looking over some Ask Jeeves suggestions for questions to ask the person you interview with for my interview tomorrow with BD Sagamore, a government relations group. I'm interviewing to join ther professional staff working on health issues. I haven't really worked on health issues since 4 yrs. ago when I worked at Veteran's Affairs. But, who knows what the Lord has planned.
I just know that my good spirit is quickly fading. So, if you're reading this please pray for me as this saga continues. I really am looking forward to a new job and staying there for a long time.
I love DC - I love it! Recently I got involved with Young Life's Capernaum Partnership (kids with special needs) and let me tell you something... if anyone in this world gets what it means to love people like Christ loves us, it's our kids at Capernaum. It's so simple to them. They love us first - just for showing up. They don't expect us to "do" anything. We make Christianity so complicated - yet everytime I spend one minute with a Capernaum student, it's like seeing the heart of our Creator.

keep it real for Jesus!
Peace out!
I will definitely need some starbucks in a few hours! and I look forward to traffic again! it's gonna take me at least an hour and half to get in to DC tomorrow.... but I'll be listening to Mat Kearney www.matkearney.com and some Jack Johnson www.jackjohnson.com
Good stuff!
Jenn <><
GO NAVY! BEAT ARMY!

Jimi Hendrix had it all wrong!

So, tonight on my way home from bible study I was thinking about what I would write.... and I started thinking about the word "experience." Isn't that a word we're all so familiar with? Whether we are Christians or not, we all want this experience that makes us feel good. And that's not what it's about.
For me personally, I've been wanting God to tell me exactly what job to take (when one comes along), where to live, who to live with etc. Then this afternoon it was like God hit me upside the head and told me to look around at the world I live in and what is going on in my life. We all know that my life should be a novel or a comedy or something like that :)
But, God is so much bigger then the experience we're looking for. He wants us to know His heart, His character, His glory. How often do I really just sit down and meditate on that? Forrest Gump's momma said that "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get." Amen to that! Life changes all the time, the things we think we deserve we don't get and what we don't want ends up being what we are. It's not always a great "experience."
And my favorite politician Richard Nixon once said, "Unless you've been in the deepest valley, you can never appreciate the highest mountain." I like that Nixon was a man who was humiliated in front of the entire world. His pride and his character were destroyed. BUT, after Watergate he decided that he would not let the "experience" of his failures determine the future. Nixon became a Christian after God broke him of his pride and his faults. Thanks to Billy Graham who mentored Nixon, I'll hang out with him in heaven some day :)
So, it's not about the good experiences always that make us stronger. Sure, God blesses us sometimes with those great "mountaintop experiences" but that shouldn't be our goal.
I've been really convicted the past few days of being content with God. In Ephesians 1, there is a list of things that Christ has done for all of us. Not one time does it mention one thing that I did or can do - other then accept who He is.
Let me encourage you all who read this. Be happy with what God is doing in your life today. Be humbled by who God made you to be today. Be searching for what God wants to do with you tomorrow. Be a person who is worthy of walking next to Christ Himself.
Can I get an AMEN!

Birth

Wow! What a week it's been. God sure has me out of my comfort zone a lot lately! I know that He is in control, but I'll admit it's not always easy to remember amidst life's current circumstances. Today I saw a car lisence plate that said "Psalm 91" - I knew I'd read it before, but today I read it again..... "he who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty." God wants to be that to me right now and it's definitely taking me being broken of pride to humble myself before His Greatness. When I've taken care of myself for as long as I have it just becomes part of life. That's no good reason though. So, while this time is of brokenness, it is a time when I know people are praying for me and I can't wait to see what miracle He does so that I can confess his Greatness to the world.
Birth.... This week Owen Robertson was born to my good friends Julie and Eric. It is such a beautiful thing to see a newborn child. God created Owen and knew his name before the world began. He knew that Julie and Eric would be his parents and that Kate would be his sister. It made me think of Psalm 139, He knew the number of days we would all have before time began. Think about that a minute... for real think about it. What a loving Creator and Provider we have.
My sincerest thanks goes out to all of you who are praying for me during this time of looking for a new job (hoping that I get the job with the Civil War Preservation Trust) and looking for a place to live.
You all know that friendship and relationship building is my favorite thing to do and my passion. I have started to volunteer with Capernaum (part of Young Life) and I can tell you that it is just amazing to see how simple the love of Christ is. Our students with special needs are amazing. Some of them can not speak, but when they smile you feel like it's God Himself.
I'm sorry for rambling on.... I am just in a "mushy" mood right now.... Please feel free to post a comment.

In Him,
Jenn <><

This week

What a week it's been! Saturday Aunt Debbie, Uncle Pete, and my cousin Johanna stopped by for some noodles for lunch and it was great to see them :) Uncle Pete cracks me up. He's one of those guys who does hilarious things without intending to - which makes it all the more hilarious! Thanks for coming guys! And Johanna - she's like a violin genius! She's auditioning for colleges all over the place... my advice was just to get out of Ohio. Sorry to my peeps who still call the state home... I'll pray for you!
Is Julie ever going to have the baby? Julie Robertson that is.... I can't wait for him/her to come on out so we can play. But, Kate is the sweetest ever! She rules the schools fo shizzle!
Tuesday Heather Cox arrived for a visit which was cool. She departed to head to the NYC after a few days of visiting. Then Lizzy came to town and I got to hang with her a few days.
Amidst all that... I had an interview on Tuesday with the Civil War Preservation Trust (www.civilwar.org), it was my second interview and it went great! They loved me of course! And their photographer was the most gifted man I'd ever seen in his work. (www.michaelmelford.com) - dude, he is my new hero! I wonder if I can take lessons or just hang out with this guy next time he comes to the CWPT?
Anyway, after a tough week of waiting, I got a call by my potential future boss who was calling in regards to an event. BUT, he did say that he would be calling me back very soon to speak about something else. So, I'm feeling confident that I'm going to get this job.

God has been so incredibly faithful and patient with me during this time of me feeling like a thug for being unemployed etc. It's been tough y'all.... But, what a time it's been with God. He has truly been showing me that the "I AM" is all that I really need. AMEN!

So, here's the dillio.... After I get this spot at the CWPT I will save up a month and then move in toward the city with some friends... and yo, I can't wait! I am looking forward to being close to the trails and this city that is so beautuful. Come visit me!

John 3:30 "He must increase, I must decrease."

GO NAVY! BEAT ARMY!

Jenn's First Post

Actually, this is Robertson, but... Jenn will be posting soon.

Thank you, and good night.